8-4-2021 Journal Entry, aka The New England Vacation, and Maine Part 1

Life's been kind of crazy.  In the beginning of July, I took Billy, Kimberly, Eli, and my mom on a vacation to the New England States.  We landed in Boston (flew first class for the first time in my life), and drove to Philly where we stayed for the first half.  The first full day, we were going to spend 4th of July in DC.  But, between a delayed flight and trouble getting a rental car, we were up late and slept in.  Then we had to drive to DC.  The place I thought we could catch the metrorail was under construction so we had to catch a shuttle to another station.  By the time we got up to the street level, mom was tired and needed a rest.  We were going to have to walk a couple of blocks to catch the night tour.  We were beginning to realize mom couldn't make it and she said she'd just sit on her walker while the rest of us went.  I don't remember what set Billy off, but he started cursing and mom and I got onto him so he started cursing at us.  Mom raised her hand to slap him and I just lost it and smacked him upside the head.  The next thing I knew I was seeing stars.  He'd punched me in the head and then took off down the street.  The streets were so crowded and there was police around, I expected one or both of us to be arrested and I didn't care, but nothing happened.  He texted the group that he only makes things worse, but that sounds like his dad--not sorry, just manipulative.  I started crying and Kim hugged me and said it wasn't my fault.  I felt bad for the car situation the night before (I had forgotten to raise my spend limit and the bank was closed) and I knew that if I'd had Scott's help planning the trip, it would have been better.  By the time Billy came back, the trip was ruined for me.  I didn't want to be around him and I felt I didn't even like my own son.  My head hurt for a solid week.  We decided to give up and go back to the hotel.

The next day we drove to NYC and rode the open top tour bus.  Then we took a river cruise around Manhattan and learned a lot.

The next day, we did a tour of Philadelphia, then we drove to Hershey, PA, to see the Hershey Factory.  I'd hoped one of those days we'd have time to go to Atlantic City, but we didn't.  I also wanted to drive through Amish country, but everyone was tired, so we just went straight back to the hotel.

The next day, we drove back to Boston, but went through Connecticut and Rhode Island.  We stopped in Mystic, CT, where they have a cute little village of shops.  Then we saw some of the mansions in Newport, RI, and then we went to the zoo in Providence.

The next day, we were on a Boston trolley tour.  We were supposed to go to Gloucester to do a whale watch cruise but the tour made us miss it, so we had to reschedule it.  Mom and I wanted to see Cape Cod and Martha's Vineyard, but the other 3 wanted to go back to the hotel and we couldn't leave Billy in the room alone.

The next day we drove up New Hampshire and down Vermont.  We stopped in Littleton, NH, and Stowe, VT.  I tried to stop at Ben and Jerry's factory, but no one wanted ice cream.

The next day was supposed to be Maine, but we did the whale watch cruise in Gloucester.  It was really fun.  Tropical Storm Elsa had gone through the day before and they said they'd never had so many sightings.  We saw 2 pods of 4, among others.  They kept popping up on the right side of the boat and we were sitting on the left.  We could all run to the other side, but mom couldn't.  One of the crew told the captain, so he turned the boat around.

The next day, we flew home.

I started calling Billy's school, his therapist, his case worker, his church group leader--anyone to get some help.  My therapist suggested that I had pretty much checked out after Scott died and let Billy do whatever he wanted.  So, I told Billy I was sorry I had checked out but I'm back now and there will be rules and he will follow them or else he can't live with me.  It was like he had taken over and it was all his rules.  I couldn't talk to him without him yelling and cursing at me.  I told him that if he had to go to Ozanam or Gillis, he'd lose his job at Chick-fil-A and his dog.  He started doing better at doing what I said.  He also was working almost every free moment, except Wednesdays with youth group, Saturday mornings (therapy), and when they're closed on Sundays.

At one point, he had a problem with his sister at work and said he was quitting and cussed at his sister.  I told him she's protecting him from being fired but she wanted him transferred to another store.  He freaked out because he likes this store and apologized to her.

Last night he was upset and wailing because he thought he was going to be fired because he was scheduled to close and I came to pick him up at 10 so they told him to go ahead and go.

I was sad I had missed going to Maine and Billy was going to go to ONEweek (church camp), so I decided to go to Maine by myself.  I dropped Billy off early on a Monday morning and I went to the airport.  I just took a carry-on and my backpack,  I thought things were starting off great because I got to watch a Gerard Butler movie on the way to Charlotte, my layover.  I kind of missed first class because I was stuck between two men and one spilled his Dr. Pepper down my pants' leg.  When we got to Charlotte, there were storms there and we were forced into a holding pattern for over an hour.  They were talking about landing somewhere to refuel.  Finally Charlotte cleared us to land.  But, they wouldn't bring out the gate because there was lightning. So we sat for over an hour before they let us off the plane.  They told us not to worry about missing connections because Charlotte wasn't letting anyone take off or land.  I got a text that my connection was canceled and they wanted me to rebook for the next day to Boston.  I looked at alternatives and found one to Manchester, NH and booked it.  It kept being delayed and then the gate changed.  When I got to the new gate, they were boarding for Portland, Maine, which is where I was going to stay.  I thought about seeing if I could change my ticket, but I looked up rental cars there and they were almost double the price.  After more delays, I finally got on a plane.  I was scared I wasn't going to make it to the rental car counter in time.  Most are 24 hour, but this one closed at 1:30am.  We landed at 1am, but we were still taxiing!  And I was about halfway back in the plane.  When I got off I asked the nearest person where the rental cars were and she said the next building over!  I walked as fast as I could and arrived at 1:15.  The only car left was an orange Chevy Equinox.  It was better than the Ford Explorer we had on the last trip.  It was uncomfortable and had more buttons than I could figure out what they did.  I drove to my hotel in Portland and got there about 3:30am.  The system had kicked out my reservation at 2am and the computer was down for monthly maintenance.

To be continued...

Express Lane Thursday

Somber and disconsolate therapy with a side of musical theatre in the park. Overall, a well-rounded day.

People Who Hurt

(I don't like Blogger's new format.  Used to be, when I didn't finish a blog, but later came back and published it, the date would revert back to when I started the blog.  That's not happening anymore.  This blog was written around January 2013)

I don't like confrontation at all.  I would rather just slink away and lick my wounds in private.  And that's what I've always done.  I'm sure it's partly because that's my personality and partly a learned behavior.  My ex-husband was not exactly easy to talk to and even harder to argue with.  His temper made me afraid to talk about any real problems...and there were a lot of them.  So, I internalize.  Blah, blah, blah, psycho-babble.

Now I've been forced into two confrontations in one week.  It't not enough that I have stress in my life from every side.  Job stress, children stress, health stress, continuous ex-husband stress, plus I'm having a depression relapse.  No, two individuals had to bring confrontation to me.

To the family member who got feathers ruffled because I didn't immediately accept a Facebook friend request from someone who (I thought) was already on my friend list and then posted that I was a fatty that she didn't care about and then claimed her account was hacked: whether you believe it or not, I AM a nice person.  Do you think I couldn't have hurled back some insults?  Do you think I don't get angry or can't think up hateful things to say?  But part of being an adult and a Christian is controlling your tongue.  Not saying what immediately comes to mind.  Letting Christ control.  I am not perfect and I screw up plenty.  I am not tooting my own horn.  But, I want to be more and more like Christ.  So, instead of responding in kind, I pray for you.  When I FEEL like yelling back and telling you what I think of you, instead I am trying to forgive you and love you anyway and bite my tongue.

To the "friend" who abandoned me with no warning, no provocation then months later after I have made peace with it, shows back up asking me why we aren't friends anymore: isn't it sort of hypocritical to a) abandon and avoid me without telling me why, then tell me that if you did something wrong, I should speak up and tell you about it; and b) ask me to tell you what you did wrong and then when I do, you get defensive and cuss me out and run away again?  I know you have stuff going on in your life.  I wanted to be there for you.  I tried and then you cut me out of your life.  I have stuff going on in my life too, but do you care?  Were you there for me when my grandpa died?  Are you here for me when I am going through medical tests and doctors' appointments?  Are you here when my son is being kicked out of school or my daughter is breaking the rules and sneaking around or when my other daughter is struggling with depression?  Where were you when I had a confrontation with my ex-husband about the kids?  Are you around to help out and babysit when I am overwhelmed?  Where are you when I am stressed and struggling?  Since you obviously can't remember how things went down, let me refresh your memory: I invited you to several get-togethers and you refused every one.  You can say you have thought of my children every day, but you declined invitations to birthday parties.  Our mutual friend told me that when we would plan a get-together, your first question was whether I would be there because you didn't want to hang out with me.  If I was going, you refused to go.  After posting some portraits on my Facebook photography page and then copying the link to my personal page, I read a post from you about how pathetic it is for "some people" to post pictures over and over and that it won't get you more likes.  Then later that day, I find I have been blocked from your Facebook page and that you unliked my photography page.  You talked me into starting the photography business and now you won't support me.  This was all so junior high-ish and I don't have the patience or the heart to chase after someone who doesn't want to be my friend.  So, I unfriended you on Facebook.  I didn't hear from you at all after that.  Except I heard you were asking about me and saying you missed me.  You had my number. You could have called me any time.  Then I get this text message late at night, saying you missed me, asking what you did wrong, etc.  I answered you honestly and kindly.  You denied it all.  What more could I say, so I said nothing further.  I don't want to argue, I don't need friends like this, so I find it best to just say nothing at all.  There would be no convincing you, so why try?  So, what is your response?  To cuss me out and accuse me of being childish.  You want me to forget you ever texted me, delete your number, and have a nice life.  I love the added touch of "I tried."  You tried what--to insult me?  To start a fight?  Then three months later, out of the blue, I get a Facebook friend request?  Really?  The last words I heard from you were to cuss me out and tell me to forget you and then you think we can just be friends like nothing ever happened?  I pray for you and your children and I forgive you for how you treated me.  However, I will not be a doormat.  I will surround myself with friends who love me and are there for me, not ones that use me and insult me.  I am so sorry for the troubles you have in your life.  I pray that you find a friend who will be there for you and that you can have mutual respect with, but it's not me.  I would have loved to have been there for you, but I have to have boundaries or else I end up taking on more hurt and disappointment than I can emotionally and mentally handle.

Maybe this post sounds harsh and mean, but I have to get my feelings out here so they don't stay bottled up or explode onto others.  I get angry too.  I get hurt too.  But, I am striving to be like my Savior.  Lord, bless these two who have hurt me and help me not to be bitter and angry about it.

'Twas the Night After Thanksgiving

'Twas the night after Thanksgiving and all through the home,
Not a creature was thankful for the blessings they'd been shown.
The leftovers were tossed in the fridge without care,
In the dread that turkey sandwiches would long be found there.

The children were nestled in grandma's spare beds,
While visions of Christmas toys danced in their heads.
And grandma wept quietly at the disastrous meal
But, no one in the house cared how she feels.

Jim brought his new girlfriend, wife and kids left behind.
Jerry had been drinking and kept speaking his mind.
Debbie picked fights and George stormed out
Uncle Phil sat all day, talking about his gout.

Bobby and Charlie didn't come to dinner at all.
They pitched a tent outside of the mall.
For Black Friday shopping, they must be first in line.
To get a deal on an iPad, they gave up family time.

John is in Iraq, serving his country with pride,
Junior stayed at home, brushing his family aside.
"They're ridiculous and embarrassing, I can't believe we're related.
I'd rather stay home and watch football," he stated.

No one was happy, they all complained.
The food was treated with utter disdain.
The stuffing's too wet, the turkey's too dry.
"You didn't fix my favorite, grandma, why?"

The grandkids ran screaming from room to room,
The little ones broke a window with a broom.
The teenagers reeked of more than just smoke
And knocked over grandpa's handmade clock, which broke.

The kids ran unchecked and out of control
They were rude and impolite and mean to little Nicole.
The older ones barely spoke a word all day,
They just kept their phones in their hands, texting away.

Though it was now midnight, Molly and Abigail were ready to go
Heading for lines and sales to save lots of dough.
Forgetting to help out other families in need,
Buying more toys to feed their spoiled kids' greed.

When up in the heavens, there arose such a clatter,
Yet all were so self-centered, it didn't seem to matter.
When all of His good and perfect gifts are ignored,
You should know in a moment, it must be the Lord.

And then, in a twinkling, life will pass by in a jerk.
He spoke many words, now we should get straight to work.
He was heard to exclaim as he rose out of sight,
"Be thankful in all and love your neighbor day and night."

Family Reunion 2010

This year's Cooper Family Reunion was really fun. I had hoped that this camping trip would be quite simple, but it turned out to be more complicated than I had planned. The kids were supposed to be at their dad's, so packing and cooking for two is much easier. However, their dad never called, so I had to pack for all five of us. It takes a lot to entertain the three kids. And much more to feed them. And my husband decided he didn't want to live on hotdogs and hamburgers for the weekend either, so he devised all sorts of meals, which made packing food and supplies a little more difficult. And I had forgotten about our dog Jesse. So, we decided to rent a U-Haul trailer to haul all of our stuff out there.

Scott had gotten his vacation time during Labor Day weekend, so we took the children out of school and headed down to Oklahoma on Thursday. We left later than we had planned to (which is always the case). It is a five hour drive from Kansas City to Heyburn Lake. As we got nearer to our destination, we saw lightning and dark clouds. We arrived just before dark and began to set up our campsite. Our rented site was next to the nice bathrooms/shower house, in front of the swimming beach, but the bathrooms were locked, which made us angry since that was the whole reason we rented that spot. We were clear on the other side of the camp from my family and quite a way from the other, smaller bathrooms. Kimmy and Billy had both been throwing up prior to our coming to the reunion. As we were furiously putting up our campsite, my mom and my Aunt Janie drove over and Janie offered us her campsite since they had played musical campsites. We hurriedly took down what we'd done and drove over to the other side and put everything up by them. It was dark by then, but we had help from my cousins Jill and Jimmy. There was lightning on both sides of us, but still no rain. We got everything set up and got the kids in their tent and in bed. We finished up and went to bed ourselves. We had been in our tent about five minutes when the storm started. The thunder and rain was deafening. My mom texted that if the kids were scared, they could come over and stay in the camper they were in, but I said we would get soaked just going the few feet from our tent to theirs, let alone across the street to their camper and that I hoped the kids were asleep. Somehow through the roar, Scott heard one of the kids say "mom". We tried to look through the window and saw flashlights on in their tent, but couldn't hear anything. I yelled, "I can't hear you! Lay down and go to sleep!" The seams on our tent were leaking a little and we had a couple of puddles and my blanket got a little damp.

The next day, we visited with family and Scott, Janie, and I went to the store to get groceries and supplies for the family reunion, while my mom stayed with the kids. The kids swam in the blow up pool we had at the campsite. I liked being on the family side of the camp this time because the kids could run around and visit and play and not get into too much trouble. Everyone watched out for everyone else. My great-uncle Gary and great-aunt Bessie came and brought their grand-daughter Courtney and she and Arrena really hit it off. After that, those girls were off on bikes around the camp the rest of the weekend. The problem started when the kids' dad's mom called me and said she was coming to pick up the kids. Chris and I had discussed this weekend the last time we talked and he said he would call me and arrange picking up the kids. He had not called and now here they were, looking forward to the weekend with us. They had hoped that he wouldn't call because they wanted to go to the family reunion. They were furious when their grandma called and they thought they would have to leave. They called their grandma back and asked to talk to their dad. He called them back and Arrena told him that they didn't want to go. He asked to speak to me and I told him that they had thought they were staying at the family reunion since he hadn't called like he said he would and hadn't shown up for his last weekend like he was supposed to. He backed off and said they could stay and the kids were happy. Janie and us combined forces and made up hamburgers and hotdogs to feed everyone that was coming in and setting up camp that night. We sat around a campfire and made s'mores.

Saturday was the family reunion. After breakfast and the morning visits, playtime, etc., we went up to the pavilion and started setting up. Family that hadn't camped started trickling in. It was nice to see lots of cousins I haven't seen in a couple of years. First we had lunch, then the kids got their toys. Then the annual auction started. We brought home a horse clock for the girls' room and some blue champagne glasses that my aunt is etching our names on. After that, the guys had their horseshoe tournament and the women did their "cake" walk. I thought Scott was going to win the horseshoe tournament for a minute--he made it to the final round and was ahead for a while, but my cousin Tammy's husband Randy beat him in the end. I won the second cake walk and got a kitchen prize basket. My mom and my brother left before I knew it. I thought I had longer with them and was disappointed that they had to leave so soon. I had brought an angel food cake and watermelon for my mama and hadn't gotten it out yet! Family started to leave and we started to head back to our campsites.

Sunday, we hung around, visiting. The kids went to pet a horse. They are putting in an equestrian trail behind where we were camping and we talked to a lady that is a part of it quite a bit, so she let the kids pet her horse. We learned from her that the bathroom problems we have had for years were because of the old caretakers and there is a new caretaker that just came in about six weeks ago and has already started changing things around there. He would have had the bathrooms fixed, but the plumber that came out to do didn't have the right licensing and had to come back later. I got my baby "fix", holding a cousin's baby girl named Eland. Then we took the kids down the the lake to swim. Arrena and Courtney were broken-hearted when Courtney had to go home. They had become good chums in three short days. We had another combined dinner with tacos and chicken chili and more fussing over Eland. Then we had an unwelcome visitor. A tarantula walked into my aunt's campsite. Not a good camp to visit, as she is deathly afraid of spiders of any sort. I have to admit that I am not too fond of spiders after that one unknown spider bit me and made me very unwell several years back. A large fuzzy tarantula doesn't appeal to me either. My great-aunt Ruthann said, "Jill, look out." My cousin Jill stood up from the picnic table she had been sitting at and I looked and there was a tarantula on the ground crawling towards her. Jill shrieked and jumped up on the bench of the table. She said that she would have run or jumped up on the table, but she was holding her dog Alexis, who was on a chain, hooked to something and she couldn't go far. In her hurry to get away from the tarantula, she nearly wrung Alexis' neck off! Janie jumped up and stood at a distance, I think trying to judge which was was the best direction to run. I laughed because she had been trying to convince me to look for one out on the road to poke with a stick because she had heard that they jump ten feet. I said, "Hey, don't you want to see if they jump ten feet?" Well, when someone started poking at it, it ceased being funny and I decided that was my cue to leave my chair, in case they DO jump ten feet. The poking was meant to get it to go back the other way and leave, but the stupid thing went the wrong way and came TOWARD us. It ran under the picnic table, causing a wave of panic and then went up the picnic table. That caused Jill to bolt. Somehow she got Alexis loose and managed to get away. Scott asked her later if she would have sacrificed her dog to the tarantula and she said most definitely. Janie, in the meanwhile, hightailed it into the trailer and stood peering out of the window. Jennifer and Jimmy managed to corral and scoop up the tarantula and took him out to the street and released him. I wish I had thought sooner and gotten the whole episode on video. Whether it was the same one or a different one, I don't know, but about an hour or so later, a tarantula returned to Janie's campsite and was again scooped up by my cousin Jimmy and taken back to the street and released. In the twenty-three years we have been out there, we have never seen a tarantula out there before.

Monday, we spent the morning visiting and packing up our campsite. Everyone was leaving, so we were all saying our good-byes. We finally left around lunch time and got home about dinner time. The weather was so beautiful the whole time we were there. The high temperatures were only in the 80s and with the breeze off the lake, it was lovely. It was even chilly early in the morning and in the evenings. I wish I had checked the forecast for the lows and packed the kids some jackets at least. We couldn't have asked for better weather. It was getting a little warm on Monday, I think in the 90s, but the wind was so strong, we hardly noticed.

I am beginning to think that I am allergic to camping at Heyburn Lake...or my family. I have camped down there twice and both times ended up with a migraine. The last one I got while I was down there, this one I got two days after I got back and has lasted five days so far. Wonder if I got bit by a migraine bug. Is there a repellent for that?

It's a Slow Fade

Every time I hear this song, it reminds me of our family and brings tears to my eyes.

Slow Fade by Casting Crowns

Be careful little eyes what you see
It's the second glance that ties your hands as darkness pulls the strings
Be careful little feet where you go
For it's the little feet behind you that are sure to follow

It's a slow fade when you give yourself away
It's a slow fade when black and white have turned to gray
Thoughts invade, choices are made, a price will be paid
When you give yourself away
People never crumble in a day
It's a slow fade, it's a slow fade

Be careful little ears what you hear
When flattery leads to compromise, the end is always near
Be careful little lips what you say
For empty words and promises lead broken hearts astray

It's a slow fade when you give yourself away
It's a slow fade when black and white have turned to gray
Thoughts invade, choices are made, a price will be paid
When you give yourself away
People never crumble in a day

The journey from your mind to your hands
Is shorter than you're thinking
Be careful if you think you stand
You just might be sinking

It's a slow fade when you give yourself away
It's a slow fade when black and white have turned to gray
Thoughts invade, choices are made, a price will be paid
When you give yourself away
People never crumble in a day
Daddies never crumble in a day
Families never crumble in a day

Oh be careful little eyes what see
Oh be careful little eyes what you see
For the Father up above is looking down in love
Oh be careful little eyes what you see

Family Reunion/Camping Trip

I learned that some of my family is reading my blog, so I guess that means I can't gossip about anyone from the family reunion.... Ha, ha! Just kidding!

I had tried to send a picture from my cell phone with the caption, "Live from the family reunion" to this blog, but apparently it didn't go through.

Well, the weekend was really fun, but it seemed to fly by!

It seemed like everything was stacked against us from the start. Chris had wanted to get an early start at work on Thursday night/Friday morning (whichever way you look at it--it's Thursday night for me because I haven't gone to bed yet, but Friday morning for him because he has and is up for the day). He wanted to leave at midnight and I get off work at 11:45pm. But, I had to work an extra hour Thursday. That part didn't bother me much because we had gotten off early so much the week before that I needed to make up for it. But, that meant Chris didn't leave for work until about 2:00am. I had also wanted to go to the store after work, but between working late and Chris needing to get to work, I ended up having to do my shopping in the morning. And of course, I had to run to several different places: Wal-Mart, Dollar General, K-Mart, Sam's, Perfect Peace, Wal-Mart again, etc. Then I had to go pick up the U-Haul trailer we were renting. That turned into a bigger deal than it should have been because the lights weren't working right. So, by the time I got home, Chris pulled in about five minutes behind me. He was muttering about how we weren't going to get out of here until 6:00pm. We had planned to leave early enough to get the girls out of school early. We loaded the truck and the U-Haul, Chris ran a couple of errands, picked up the girls from school (on time), I took a shower, he changed the oil, and we left...at 6:00pm.

The gate at the campground is locked at 10:00pm, so we had four hours to get there. Plus, it would be dark when we had to put up our tent and there had been thunderstorms in the forecast for that area. So, we were racing the clock and the elements. We thought we would be fine because it should only take two and a half to three hours at the most to get there.

Let me just say that I will never again use MapQuest! This is no1t the first time that the directions have been off. I should have known better from the last time. It's been two years since I have been down there and I thought I remembered that we had gotten turned around trying to take people's advice about a shorter way. Well, I thought I knew the way from my aunt's town (Sapulpa) to the lake about 25 minutes away. So, I put in for directions through Sapulpa, which is a little out of the way, but I thought it would be worth it if it put us in familiar territory. When we got off the highway at the Sand Springs/Sapulpa exit, we ran into a one way frontage road going the wrong way. So, Chris got frustrated with me (I was driving) and made me pull over and he got us turned around (remember we had a trailer and can't turn on a dime) and drove the rest of the way in. The directions said to turn onto 151st street. Once we got to that point of the directions, I couldn't find it. We came to a light at highway 33 that had a sign directing us to turn right to get to Heyburn Lake. But, there was another sign saying you could get to Heyburn Lake by going straight. And I wasn't seeing this 151st street. So we kept going. Eventually I saw a sign that said 161st street. So that made me think we had passed it (unless we were getting ready to enter another town). I tried to find another street sign to confirm, but it was too dark. When Chris realized that I was lost (WE were lost), he lost his temper. We decided that we thought we had passed it, but we weren't sure where we were supposed to be going. It then dawned on me that I hadn't written down anyone's phone number to call in case we got lost. My mom was at work until 11pm, so I couldn't call her. My grandparents weren't at home, they were there camping! So, we were really in trouble. And time was passing by quickly. And we could see lightning nearby. My husband happens to be a man that actually asks for directions. He turned us around and at the first gas station, he stopped to ask for directions. Only he wasn't being clear--he was asking for this elusive 151st street and none of them knew what he was talking about. One guy approached and asked if we had gotten the information we needed. When Chris said no, the guy asked if he could help. I piped up and clarified that we were looking for Shepherd's Point on Heyburn Lake. Instead of just giving the directions, the guy wanted to chat. "Oh, I'm camping on the other side of the lake from you. What are y'all going up there for? My dad's up there now and he says there's no more spots to rent...." Finally he tells us to go back up the road about four miles and turn left at the light, then six or seven miles up the road and turn at the wooden "Shepherd's Point" sign. From his directions, I suspected he was talking about highway 33. Chris was loathe to follow his directions because he thought the guy was drunk, but he did and sure enough, we got there. We pulled in at 9:30pm. The gatekeeper knew exactly who we were and said they had been wondering if we would make it.

We pulled in and found our campsite. As we got out, my uncle Billy called out from his tent in the spot next to us, "Robin? Is that you?" I answered that it was. He came over and helped us decide on a flat spot for the tent and loaned us his rake and talked with us for a few minutes. He was tired, so he went back to his tent and went to sleep. We commenced with setting up our tent in the dark with lightning flashing all around. We finally got it up, secured our stuff, and went to bed. I don't think it ended up raining after all.

I couldn't sleep. There were these people across the road from us that were up half the night being loud. They weren't rowdy, obnoxious people. I suspect that they just slept through the heat of the day and stayed up visiting and partying half the night. And there were two golden labs that were running around loose that kept barking at those people half the night. We thought they belonged to the people a little ways down and weren't sure why they weren't chained. They kept running around the campsite. My uncle said they chewed up his spatula. I got up to go to the bathroom in the middle of the night and the dogs came towards me, barking and growling. I took up a fight stance and shined my flashlight in their eyes and said in a loud, gruff voice, "Get on out of here!" They took off. I went back to the tent and slept off and on. I was awakened in the wee hours by something running over my feet. The dogs were running circles around our tent and had run across the corner where my feet were. Chris ran them off and brought all our shoes inside because they had been sniffing at the girls' shoes and if my uncle's spatula was any indication, they wouldn't be safe outside.

I had planned to go to the store once we got there on Friday night, but since we arrived so late, I couldn't have made it back before the gate was locked. We hadn't wanted to transport food stuffs, so we decided to buy it when we got there. Well, as a result, we had nothing for breakfast until I went to the store. My uncle Billy said we should go over and eat with the rest of the family (most of them, for the 21 years they have been using this campground, have been camping at the other end, on the other side of the pavilion that we use for the reunion from where we were). I said I had to go to the store, but tried to get Chris and the girls to go over there, but they wouldn't. Me and little Billy went to the Wal-Mart in Sapulpa and Chris and the girls set up the rest of our campsite.

I called my mother on my way out at 8am, figuring they would be well on their way as she and my brother had been planning to leave at 7am. She said that my brother hadn't come to get her yet, but was on his way. It took us so long at the store, between Billy having to go to the bathroom and Chris calling to tell me he needed more supplies, that we didn't get back to camp until after 10:00am. We made some sandwiches to tide us over until the family lunch. Mom and Bub got there and I went up to the pavilion to say hi. Also, we took a card and birthday gift over to my grandpa--he turned 82 last week and I was bad and didn't get over to see him. I couldn't think if a good gift for him so I bought him one of my favorite books: Room of Marvels by James Bryan Smith. We visited with them for a little while, then went back to our camp. Not long after, we went up the hill to the pavilion to join the rest of the family. We visited, the kids played, we ate, then the auction started. Every year family members bring homemade crafts to be auctioned off to raise money for the next year's reunion--it covers the cost of the pavilion, the food, the toys for the kids, etc. In the middle of that, it started to rain. Chris and Billy went back to our camp to secure anything that couldn't get wet and they stayed there and took a nap. The wind picked up suddenly and nearly blew everything away. I had noticed a steadily building headache, but had ignored it. It kept going and became a full-blown migraine. Worst one I have had in years. I wanted to stay so bad, but I kept feeling more and more sick. I stayed through the cake walk and then we said good-bye and I took the girls back to camp. I was so sick at that point, I wasn't even sure I could walk that far (and it wasn't far). We laid down in the tent (it had stayed dry inside) and I rested. By dark, I tried to get up and around for a while, but I was still feeling horrible. Chris made dinner, but I didn't eat it because I felt so bad. My uncle Billy blamed it on us not going and eating breakfast when he told us to. I blame it on a combination of being tired, the stress of the day before, having no caffeine all day (i was trying to drink water and juices), and the heat.

The dogs had been picked up by the county that day--the people down the way weren't their owners after all. Their owners had dumped them off several weeks prior and left them. At least I didn't have their barking or running me over to keep me awake. The people across the street kept me awake briefly, but not for long. The next day the headache was mostly gone. I kept having flashes of pain, but nothing major.

It's become a tradition for the family members that have camped out to get together Sunday morning and combine food for a big breakfast. We brought our bacon, eggs, & hashbrowns, but my uncle Billy made us take them back because they had enough. Uncle Billy and my great-uncle Richard cooked up a big huge breakfast and we had a good time eating and visiting. A lot of the family was leaving that day because the forecast called for more rain and everyone else that had been in tents hadn't been as lucky as we were and had gotten wet. So, after breakfast, they went back to their camps to pack up. We went to Wal-Mart to get a few more supplies (our lantern wasn't working, so we had little more than flashlight light after sunset). When we got back, Arrena and Kimmy played in the pavilion with their cousins. Billy swam in our blow-up pool, while Chris put the new lantern together and we started lunch. When we got lunch done, I drove to the other end of the campground to invite others to eat with us. My Aunt Janie was the only one who came down, so we had cheddar brats and watermelon and chips. She taught the girls to play the card game "books" and she sat and chatted with me for a couple of hours. She decided to go back to camp to see if she could help--she said they were making tacos for dinner and we should come over.

We took the kids down to the swimming beach because they had been clamoring to swim in the lake. We didn't stay there long. After that, Chris and the kids gathered firewood because the girls wanted to roast marshmallows later. They built up a fire in the fire pit and then we went over to the other side of the campsite.

I guess they all changed their minds about having tacos. My great-uncle Gary and great-aunt Bessie were leaving, and Aunt Janie, me, Chris, my cousin Angie, her husband Ronnie, and my cousin Tammy's husband Randy played honeymoon rummy. I had never played before. It's kind of like Phase 10, only harder. When it got dark, we put up a light and kept playing. We were cutting it close because Angie and Ronnie weren't camping and had to be out before the gate was locked at 10pm. Ronnie won and I came in second! Not too bad for my first time playing. They were laughing at Chris because he misunderstood the directions for the last hand and there was no way he could recover. The kids played with their cousins and entertained cousin Tammy and my great-aunt Ruthann. Billy had them all thinking he was so cute, despite his hitting his sisters, refusing to sit in Tammy's lap, and the lovely moment when he bent over and put his butt in Kimmy's face and farted loudly. Everyone laughed and I hung my head. Where did I go wrong?

It was nearly 10pm when we got back to our camp and we were hungry, so we threw on some burgers and reheated some of the brats from lunch. My aunt Janie and cousin Jimmy came over and ate with us. Billy fell asleep in his chair. The girls finally got to roast their marshmallows and made s'mores. They were so thrilled. I couldn't get Billy to wake up, so the girls made one for him and we put it away. Then we all headed to bed. Incidentally, it didn't rain again.

My aunt Janie and cousin Jimmy came over again in the morning for breakfast. She said that she felt like she was constantly bumming food off of us, but we didn't care--we had plenty! They packed up and her daughter (my cousin Jennifer) and her husband came and picked up their stuff and they left. We packed in our camp, said our good-byes to those that remained and headed out, finding the better route in and out of there, instead of the long way!

All in all, we had a blast. I was glad to get back home though, if for no other reason than that it's nice to get out of the shower and not immediately get my feet dirty again. And the bathrooms out there were HORRENDOUS! I don't expect much from campground bathrooms, but this was ridiculous. Where we camped was between the two bathrooms. There was one between us and the pavilion and that's the one we all usually use. When we got there, one of the two toilets in the ladies bathroom either hadn't been flushed or wouldn't flush. I flushed it and it mostly went down. When I tried to flush the rest, it wouldn't flush again. So, everyone used the remaining toilet. Then it clogged up and flooded, with excrement and toilet paper all over the floor, clear to the door. So that bathroom was unusable. The other one was much nicer at first, but the following day after we started using it, someone got nasty and smeared "stuff" on the wall in one stall and in the other there was something all over the front of the toilet. I suspect it was just mud, but I wasn't going to find out. At least this year the grass had been mowed. One year, the grass was so high, the kids could barely play. The family plans to inundate the Army Corps of Engineers with angry letters and are also thinking about finding a different location for the next reunion. That's sad because they have been out there for 21 years and it's part of grandpa's childhood--he told Chris he helped clear some of the trees out there.

From what I heard, there were more from my grandpa's descendants there than from any other family. I think we all suspected that this might be pawpaw's last year. Who knows, he might hang on. But, he has Parkinson's and I see such a decline in him. I sat there at the auction, watching him with tears in my eyes. He doesn't look at all like the big strong man I remember. I can't stand the thought of losing him. But, I know I will see him again and that he will be free from pain and happy with his Lord. He is likely looking forward to his home-going and seeing his sister and others again.

I almost thought about suggesting we stay out there one more day since we are on vacation and the girls had an inservice day. But, I knew they were ready to go and we needed to get things done this week. The weather hadn't been unbearable--in the low 90s (until it rained and the wind sprang up). As long as we sat still, the breeze off the lake was nice, and we stayed comfortable. It was when we moved around that we got hot and sweaty. We got back on Monday, and Tuesday here was hot from start to finish, but Wednesday, the weather changed to autumn in a flash. The temps dropped to the 50's and 60's. It felt great, but boy, was it a shock! Now this is the weather I would like to camp in! I might have to gather my little brood up for another camping trip in a couple of weekends! Right now, they are just happy to have their TV back! I pointed out that they survived three days without it and they barely touched their box of toys. They found ways to entertain themselves. Chris has been talking about getting a camper. I am perfectly fine in a tent--I actually kind of enjoy it--but the one reason I would agree to a camper is for the bathroom. They want it so they can have air conditioning and TV. I am afraid that we would never leave the camper! But, I would be happy to have a working toilet and a clean shower! We'll see what happens.

Kimmy Turns Six!

Last week was Kimmy's 6th birthday. She shares her birthday with Chris' dad who passed away almost a year before she was born. I really wish they had known each other. I think he would have gotten such a kick out of Kimmy. (By the way, this isn't a recent photo, but I love it so much! It really shows Kimmy in true form!)

I can't believe that my baby girl is 6 now! In so many ways she still seems like such a little thing. But lately, watching her with her friends, I see a maturity in her that I don't see in her peers. Her friends still act like little kids, but she tends to act older. And she is so intelligent. I have to say that she is probably the most well-behaved of my children. We went to the grocery store the other day. Arrena and Billy were horrible. They acted up the whole way through--both had to ride in the cart, both fought, both grabbed at things, both kept running off, both were loud and obnoxious. Kimmy, however, walked next to me and helped whenever she could and was very quiet.

Anyways, back to her birthday. On her birthday (Wednesday the 2nd), we went to the zoo and then to Burger King for dinner. I let her open two of her gifts and her cards from other family members. We set off a couple of daytime fireworks (snappers, bumblebees, and parachutes). We saw some thick clouds rolling in and heard some rumbles, so we hurried to set them off instead of waiting for daddy to get home. Because of the approaching storm, the wind was a little strong and a couple of our parachute guys made an invasion on one of our neighbors backyards! YIKES! I had to go to work, so we didn't do much more than that. She was disappointed at the zoo because she had wanted to feed the giraffes at a feeding station that is open twice a day, but her favorite animals weren't cooperating. One year on her birthday, the keeper let her come back behind the public area and feed one of the giraffes. Of course I didn't have my camera with me then!

On Friday (the Fourth of July), we had her slumber party/BBQ. I didn't volunteer to work for the holiday. Her heart was a little broken because with it being summer and everyone taking vacations and also with it being a holiday weekend (which can't be helped as this is when her birthday falls), most of her friends couldn't come. One we couldn't get a hold of at all (which I think was no big loss as the only things I hear about her, besides, "she's my best friend"--one of many Kimmy claims--make me believe the girl is a bully), one was going out of town, one had other plans and came by briefly but couldn't stay the night, one never responded, and another (a cousin) was supposed to be dropped off by her dad, but they never showed up. Chris countered most of this by inviting his brother and his girlfriend and their four children (plus their sister's son who was with them), and his other brother and his three kids (his daughter was already planning to stay the night). We also had both the grandmas over, the family that dropped by briefly, my friend from work and her daughter, and a few parents who lingered to chat for a few minutes before scurrying off to their night of freedom! Ha, ha. Spending the night, besides my ten-year-old niece that I previously mentioned, was Arrena's best friend (we allowed her to have one friend over) and one of Kimmy's friends from kindergarten (the gym teacher's daughter).

I think they had a good time. I painted little girls' nails (and my own) in patriotic flair--alternating red with white stripes and blue with star stickers or rhinestones. Then I think we ate. We had set up a screen tent in the backyard, which is where the men went, but the women stayed inside (it was HOT). The kids either jumped on the trampoline or played inside. Then I had all the kids put on their swimsuits and turned on the sprinkler. I had planned on putting out the wading pool, but with fourteen children, the wading pool would have been way too small. Well, the sprinkler hadn't been on a full minute, I don't think, when Billy stomped on it and broke it, so the water sprayed down instead of up. I tried to turn it over, but it didn't last long and they were back on the trampoline. The kids got dressed again and Kimmy opened her gifts. Then they ate cupcakes. I had gotten Kimmy a "cupcake cake" in the shape of a rainbow. It was beautiful, but the icing was thick (the whipped kind) and it made for messy faces! After that, we made bracelets and necklaces with gads of beads that I had bought. When it got dark, we went outside and set off fireworks for them. I had made the most of coupons and special sales, so I had a big bag of fireworks and only paid about $45 for them. Billy was really impressed, but I think the girls are getting too old because Arrena complained it was boring (nearly got herself banished) and Kimmy wanted to know why we didn't have certain kinds.

Kimmy had her heart set on these chocolate chip oatmeal cookies that I make, so I was making those at 11:00pm! Only one of the girls didn't like them--the rest loved them. I was sure they would all pass out soon (except maybe my niece who is used to staying up late), but when I went to check on them about 1:00am, only my two girls were asleep! The rest were wide awake and talking about cute boy actors! My poor little girls just hang with the party! You can see the little sleepy bodies in the picture! I went to bed not long after that, but was awakened at 2:30am by a knock on the door. It was the gym teacher's daughter with Billy. I still am not quite sure what was going on. I think he woke up and went downstairs to see what was going on and she brought him to me. That's his story anyways, from his limited vocabulary and garbled speech. I put him in bed with us and sent her back downstairs.

I woke up around 8:00am, thinking they would all surely still be asleep, after the late night they had just put in. I was wrong! They were bright-eyed and bushy-tailed. I fed them, two of the girls were picked up, I drove my niece home, dropped off the kids at their grandma's, went home to clean up the mess (!), took a nap, and went to dinner with Chris. I think I wore myself out with the plans, the preparation, and the party, because I have felt like a lazy lump ever since!

So, now my little bitty Kimmy is six! She will start first grade in a few more weeks (I can't believe it, but Kimmy's birthday was the halfway point in the summer break!). And now she has her first loose tooth! I don't know what to think about that. One of the things I love the most about Kimmy is her smile with her cute little teeth. I can barely stand the thought of her losing them! She pulled out one of her sister's just the other day. She makes fun of Arrena's "transition"--says her teeth look funny: some adult, some baby, some gone! I think it has been easier to watch Arrena grow since she acts so grownup (in attitude, if not in behavior!) than to watch my Kimmy-pop. She loves that nickname. I used to sing to her, "Kimmy, Kimmy, cocoa-pop...." So now, it gets shortened to Kimmy-pop, Cocoa-pop, Cocoa, or daddy sometimes calls her "Kimmy-cocoa."

Happy Birthday Kimmy!